90. How to Stop Overdelivering as a VA/OBM Without Losing Clients

Ever catch yourself adding "just one more thing" to a client deliverable? You know, that voice that says maybe you should send one more message, create one more graphic, or throw in an extra bonus—just to be helpful?

If you've ever felt compelled to go above and beyond what you were hired to do, this episode is going to shift everything for you. 

Most service providers think overdelivering makes them valuable, but the truth is, it's not about being helpful at all. It's about trying to feel safe in your business. And when you constantly give more than what's agreed upon, you're not just creating an energy leak—you're actually training your clients to take advantage of you.

In this episode, I'm breaking down why overdelivering is really about survival, not service, and how this pattern is keeping your business stuck in chaos and burnout. Plus, I'm sharing the exact first step you can take today to start breaking this cycle.

Key Points Covered:

✨ Why overdelivering is actually about fear, not helpfulness

✨ How "going above and beyond" trains clients to push your boundaries

✨ The connection between perfectionism, internalized patriarchy, and scope creep

✨ Why unlimited or open-ended offers set you up for overwork

✨ The "brave pause" technique to break the overdelivering pattern

✨ How to restructure your offers with built-in boundaries

If you're tired of working more hours than you're paid for, feeling resentful toward clients, or constantly questioning whether you're doing "enough," this episode will help you see that your worth isn't earned through excess—it's inherent in the value you already provide.

💫 Ready to streamline your offers and strengthen your boundaries so you can deliver powerfully without pouring from an empty cup? Let's chat about working together in Expansion - DM me "EXPANSION" on Instagram @soulfulbizcoachandrea

Thank you for being a part of the Soulpreneur Scaling Stories community!

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Chapters

• 0:00 Introduction and Episode Overview
• 1:10 The Pitfalls of Overdelivering
• 8:57 Steps to Stop Overdelivering

Transcript

[00:00:00] Introduction and Episode Overview

[00:00:00] Andrea Elibero: Andrea here, your host and passionate business coach and scaling strategist for soulful service providers and coaches. Welcome to another episode of Solepreneur Scaling Stories. Have you ever wanted to look behind the curtain of your fellow entrepreneur's business to see what actually went into scaling it?

[00:00:22] Well, you are in for a treat 'cause that's exactly what we are doing here. In each episode, we will be uncovering the truth of the lessons and the stories behind what it truly takes for sold entrepreneurs to scale their businesses intentionally. I'm hoping that their stories will help you to unlock the true potential of your business so you can create your own soulful, abundant, and aligned laptop lifestyle through intentional scaling.

[00:00:46] So whether you're just starting out on your scaling journey or you're a seasoned entrepreneur seeking inspiration, this episode has something incredible in store for you. Are you ready to rise, grow, and create a business that fully supports your dream life? Well, let's dive in. [00:01:00] Before we begin, make sure to hit that subscribe buttons.

[00:01:03] You never miss an empowering episode filled with real stories and soulful insights.

[00:01:10] The Pitfalls of Overdelivering

[00:01:10] Andrea Elibero: Okay, so

[00:01:16] you check the task off, you delivered the thing, but then something inside of you says, Hmm,

[00:01:22] maybe I should add a little more. Maybe I should send in one more message.

[00:01:26] Maybe I should give them one more graphic, you know, just in case, just to do the nice thing.

[00:01:31] I get it. This is normal. You're like, yes, I want to help.

[00:01:36] Right? Like this is me being helpful. I really want to give my clients everything. And here's the thing with that, you're not just being helpful. I. It's actually you trying to feel safe because when you overdeliver to your clients as a service provider, it's not just a time issue, it's a trust issue. And we're going to get into this on today's episode.

[00:01:59] [00:02:00] So. In the episode today, you are going to see and understand why you overdelivering is actually keeping your business kind of stuck, and how to take the very first step towards healing this.

[00:02:13] So let's dive in. Okay, so overdelivering, right? Like it's not just about being nice, it's like I said, it's not just about, oh, I really want to give this to them.

[00:02:22] You know, it doesn't necessarily come from this place of altruism.

[00:02:26] It's actually about survival.

[00:02:29] So, especially, especially, I see this so much in service providers because so many service providers are women and there are so many marginalized people, right? And so we have been taught that growing up our whole lives.

[00:02:41] We have been taught that.

[00:02:43] If you are not exceeding expectations, you're not doing enough, you are replaceable.

[00:02:49] And if you say, oh no, I've done it, that's enough. Maybe somebody calls you lazy

[00:02:54] and

[00:02:54] it's actually internalized patriarchy.

[00:02:57] And so this, all these [00:03:00] thoughts and all of this that you have grown up with since childhood, this is all internalized inside of you.

[00:03:06] It's your perfectionism. All of this is playing out in your business and in your client. Work. So I will give you an example. So I have a client who before we worked together, she actually created an offer that was, um, it was an offer that was kind of like unlimited. It was a bit open-ended. So there's a set price, I think it was around like 1500 a month.

[00:03:27] And it's VA work. This is how much you pay, and kind of like. Assuming that everything would be cool, right? And so her intention was that, yes, I'm going to take care of X, Y, Z. Like this was laid out. Like I'll do the work around these types of things. However, over time, this spiraled and spiraled and her client.

[00:03:51] Asked for more and more and more outside of the scope of what she originally intended and outside of just everything. So really she [00:04:00] was working a lot. She was working like, I don't even know, like so many extra hours. I think when we did the math it, I. Equals out to like, oh goodness, I don't even remember, like 20, or like, I dunno, something an hour that was like way below her normal rate.

[00:04:14] Right? And like, this is not what we want. Right? But when she made this offer, she's like, oh, this will be great. I can serve my clients. Everybody will be happy.

[00:04:21] And obviously it didn't work out that way.

[00:04:23] So instead of doing this.

[00:04:26] Obviously we want to do something different. So with her we are, we're working on creating a different type of offer that has set boundaries

[00:04:34] that are already built into the offer.

[00:04:36] So in this way, this internalized patriarchy is over delivering. All of this doesn't just automatically come up.

[00:04:42] We actually set things in place.

[00:04:44] That are boundaries, so that way she doesn't have to think about this,

[00:04:47] right? Like she doesn't have to worry about it like at all. So what she's doing now is podcast management.

[00:04:53] This is her unique magic. This is her zone of genius, and she's so excited about it. And so in this way we are [00:05:00] able to shift things into a more. Systematized way

[00:05:04] where everything is really laid out and then she doesn't have to overwork over, deliver just to keep her clients happy.

[00:05:11] Now, you're not alone in this.

[00:05:13] I have done this myself, right? I have a hundred percent done this myself.

[00:05:17] When clients are like, you know, okay, oh, I need this for the launch, whatever. It's like, oh, well I'm do this extra thing for you,

[00:05:24] right? Like,

[00:05:25] I'll give you this thing. Sometimes it's nice, but I noticed that I was doing this.

[00:05:30] Continuously. I was doing this too often, so now I'm overworking. I'm stressing myself out. I am. Not, it's not self-care, right? Like when you're giving everything to everybody else, you're not taking care of yourself and you need to take care of yourself in order to take care of everybody else.

[00:05:51] And doing this again, I realize, oh no, this is not out of strategy.

[00:05:55] 'cause my clients don't care. I mean, they think it's nice, but they don't care that [00:06:00] much. It was, I was operating out of fear. Oh, if I don't do this extra thing, they're going to let me go.

[00:06:05] Right? Oh, if I don't do this, they're going to replace me.

[00:06:08] And that's not what we want. So I was, I had to step into a higher level of trusting myself and realizing that what they contracted me for, what my offers are, that is more than enough and I don't have to go above and beyond that.

[00:06:23] And I invite you to also embody this as well,

[00:06:28] so. Really take this home. You, you're over-delivering, or this message is a message that I really want you to take home to kind of like take note. If nothing else,

[00:06:38] you're over-delivering. It's not noble, it's not helpful.

[00:06:42] It's actually an energy leak. And the more you do it, the more resentment builds within you.

[00:06:49] And it's also confusing to your clients because do you know what it teaches them? It teaches them that your boundaries are flexible.

[00:06:56] Right. I teach them they can ask for whatever, and you're gonna do it, so [00:07:00] you train them

[00:07:01] to

[00:07:02] take advantage of you, basically,

[00:07:04] right? You also are limiting yourself so much because the more you give, the more you give, the more you give.

[00:07:09] That's outside of the scope,

[00:07:11] or that is taking up all of your time, all of your energy. Now you're limiting, limiting, limiting your ability to scale your own business.

[00:07:19] So how can you grow your business if you're just giving everything away, one for free

[00:07:24] and two.

[00:07:26] Even if it's not for free, if they didn't ask for it,

[00:07:29] it's taking up so much from you.

[00:07:31] So how can you grow a business like that? That is, it's not possible.

[00:07:35] The third thing is that it also erodes trust in yourself because like I said before, in my example of if I was adding on giving things, it was out of fear, and that's what I see in my clients as well.

[00:07:48] It's out of this lack of self-trust, this lack of worthiness, this lack of being enough.

[00:07:54] And you are enough.

[00:07:56] You are amazing at what you do. You care so deeply for your [00:08:00] work and for your clients. You do an amazing job. I know you do.

[00:08:03] All of my clients that I work with, I know they do an amazing job.

[00:08:06] And so all it is, I don't wanna downplay all it is, but it is

[00:08:11] the ability to trust yourself and just embody and know that know that your worth does not depend on how much you give beyond what you're contracted to give

[00:08:21] your worth.

[00:08:21] Your worth is inherent in what you do,

[00:08:25] and then again, it delays the very business that you're trying to build.

[00:08:29] Because you can't grow, you do not have the energy to think about these things, let alone put them into action.

[00:08:34] You can't take on more clients, you know, you can't do any of these things

[00:08:37] if you are operating in fear, if you are operating in this way of just giving, giving, giving, and not having the boundaries and not having

[00:08:49] the confidence that what you are doing.

[00:08:52] What they paid for, what you're giving them is worth it. 

[00:08:57] Steps to Stop Overdelivering

[00:08:57] Andrea Elibero: So what can we do today? I'm going to give you one step

[00:09:01] to start with today that I invite you to. Do.

[00:09:05] So if you want to stop over delivering right now,

[00:09:08] we're not gonna start with this huge boundary, right? We're not gonna like take this big leap and go from, from like not being able to walk to like running a marathon.

[00:09:17] We're gonna do one brave pause.

[00:09:19] This is what I invite you to do right now today.

[00:09:23] The next time that you do your work and you finished what you told them you would do, stop. Period. That's it. Don't add a little extra. Don't edit it again, don't slack them Additional things don't. Don't do any of that. Mark it complete.

[00:09:42] Close your laptop and sit in the discomfort that might come up. You might feel discomfort in doing what you promised to deliver and then stopping.

[00:09:53] And that's okay because when you sit in that discomfort and you get your client feedback and say, is [00:10:00] great because it is great. We're not talking about under-delivering.

[00:10:03] We're talking about doing your job

[00:10:05] and delivering what you promised.

[00:10:07] We're just not adding on all these additional things that you're not being paid for because you feel that you're not enough

[00:10:16] and it's not about being rigid. And it's not about any of that. It's not about not doing a good job. It's about retraining your nervous system to believe that your value is not earned through excess, that you are enough.

[00:10:32] So that is it. That is what I invite you to do today, this week. Do your thing and stop

[00:10:37] and sit in the discomfort. And then the more you do that,

[00:10:41] the more you'll get used to it, the more your nervous system will regulate and the more you'll see, oh.

[00:10:47] The more, this is fine, right? My confidence will grow.

[00:10:50] And if you're listening to this and you know that, oh, this is me, she's calling me out.

[00:10:57] What is this girl talking about? Like, oh gosh.

[00:10:59] [00:11:00] Um, if you are always doing more than what you're paid for because you are terrified to do less than then.

[00:11:07] We need to work together.

[00:11:08] And the best, best way that we can work together is inside expansion, which is where we streamline your offers. We strengthen your boundaries, restructure your business so you can deliver powerfully without pouring from an empty cup.

[00:11:21] And so if this is you, I have the link in my show notes, go check it out, or DM me on Instagram that's linked there too,

[00:11:30] to be able to chat about it, to ask me about it. So, and let me know.

[00:11:36] How has this gone? Did you do the thing? Did you do it one thing? And stop and say, okay, that's enough.

[00:11:42] Let me know how that goes too.

[00:11:43] So thank you all for being here, and I will see you guys on the next one. 

[00:11:49] Thank you so much for joining us today. I really hope you found inspiration and insights from today's [00:12:00] episode. You know, scaling your business intentionally and from the inside out is a transformational process, but I'm here to support you every step of the way. Head on over to dancing leaf solutions.com/resources for free tools to help you do just that.

[00:12:14] And thank you again for being a part of the Solepreneur Scaling Stories community. Your presence and dedication to growth inspiring me every day.